Thursday 12 November 2009

Broken Dreams and New Moonbeams

I am moved
to tears that wash me
My broken heart
is a river now
fluid and serene,
A new love (yours)
has washed me clean.
for showing me
what loyalty means.
Perhaps, it seems,
I can be shy now
and stand at the beginning,
now that you
and she
have armed me
with truth and dreams.
Who would have thought
a brother-in-love
could salvage me?

I am remembering the first time my younger brother spoke of his true love for my sister-to-be. It was soon after I had had my own heart betrayed by a not so true love. And thought savagely that all poets were liars, and that all words were false. I was just gearing up to be a true cynic, weary and beautifully bitter... when everything changed. My brother fell in love. Fateful love. Find-you-across-the-other-side-of-the-world love. When-you-are-near-I-am-whole love. And I was undone...

The pictures above are of an impromptu Zoroastrian rice ceremony to celebrate their engagement. We are in the conservatory, my favourite room of the house. They are standing in a powder circle of seven fish, with red kumkum on their foreheads, garlanded and beloved. Later we ate kulfi I had made with rose petals embedded inside. The taste of the day is sweet in my memory.


RNSANE said...

Shaista, it sounds like a truly joyous and blessed day, the kind one holds in one's heart forever, to ward off evil spirits and to sustain us when times are bad. I can taste the rose petals.

A hug to you and blessing to you and your brother and the love of his life.

Stacey J. Warner said...

It is wonderful that your brother's love kept you from bitter. Ther is no return from bitter and you have too much love to give not to be open to receiving.

much love

Jeanne-ming Brantingham said...

That "around the world" love will be yours too. He is making his way to you. Be patient, as I know you already are because that kind of love pops up when you least expect it.

TheChicGeek said...

Shaista, this is beautiful. Isn't it wonderful how one moment our hearts can be breaking and a new day shines it's light on a love so powerful it warms not only those "in love," but those around it. It reminds us that there is hope and there is truth and goodness.
This has warmed my heart today and gives me hope. Simply...beautiful.
The conservatory looks like a lovely room and your kulfi with rose petals perfect for the occasion!
Thank you for sharing this warm and loving mememory :)

Hugs :)

TheChicGeek said...

Ooops, "memory" :)))

Maggie May said...

So beautiful. The love you have for your brothers and they for you makes me happy. It's so pure.

Sobrina Tung said...

Lovely :) Keep looking! I'm glad you didn't let the not-so-true get the best of you -- you are better than that!

A Cuban In London said...

The pictures are so self-explanatory that I knew what the post was about before I even read it. It's good that your brother's experience arrived in time to overcome your nascent cynicism. In my case, it was too late. My second job is as a professional cynic. :-)

Beautiful post.

Greetings from London.

Muznah said...

I love this post and I love how you talk of love, that-kind-of-love :)

caramelcaramelo said...

beautiful! and congratulations to the family. thank you for your comment on my blog. i am discovering yours. it is so full of love and joy and sadness too. very true to life itself. and the picture of tich nat hanh, is wonderful as a first sight to your blog. thank you for sharing. kenza.

Guusje said...

LOVEly, xGuusje

Jo said...

Ohhhhh .... what a lovely post. This is just what I needed to hear today. It restores my faith in love. :-)

Maia said...

We all (at least, all of us romantics) go through our cynical phases. I went through so many...oh, so many. But my optimistic soul always rebounded. Thank goodness. It was only when I had fully, honestly and joyfully embraced my solitude that I found my companion. And it was no anticlimax. It was this kind of epiphany that you describe and then some. Words are not sufficient. These days, we occupy a safe, comforting sort of bubble, my loved one and I, along with our daughter. We waited so long, and we both believed we would never find it. And yet...
Dreams do come true. I am living proof. Never stop dreaming.

Anonymous said...

Your brother is wonderful with words and at expressing his TRUE heart. Not everyone is and sometimes they re said falsely, but true love is just that...TRUE and PURE and a connection that resonates in the heart and not the head. Sounds like your brother has found that...and one day you will too.

Jeannette StG said...

What a wonderful celebration, Shaista! And you kept your heart loving, instead of being bitter - that's a major accomplishment many do not achieve, dear friend, you can be proud of that.
And your hair is beautiful!!

Ruth said...

Shaista, my dear, I read this right after you posted it, at my Google Reader, now I'm back.

It is delicious to be bitter and angry. Love is another kind of yummy food altogether. Your choice and your post, your images, your brother and his bride-to-be, you there, give me pride in humanity - the balance of joy and peace in a world of despair and pain.

Renee said...

What a beautiful poem. Beautiful.

Your brother is gorgeous and his partner looks beautiful too.

Your writing is a gift dear one.

Love Renee xoxo

Tom Bailey said...

I never have heard of eatting roses as part of something ceremonial. It is great to see your outlook being so positive.

Unknown said...

You have a gift with words and your poem is uplifting. I bet the kulifi with the rose petals just made it all sooo special too. Beautiful emoeire indeed:)))

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