Showing posts with label eva ibbotson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label eva ibbotson. Show all posts

Wednesday, 10 February 2021

JANUARY BOOK REVIEW IN FEBRUARY

‘A nightingale sang in Berkeley Squaaaare!' I've been burbling this song all day long, and I have no idea why... suddenly the line bursts off my tongue and into the vulnerable ears of whichever family member is around or on the phone... my grandmother used to sing with a tremulous treble she assigned to the throat operation which cured her of nodules. The operation destroyed the strength of her singing voice, she said, but I liked her trills and quivers. I like appropriating that quiver; it makes me feel very 1950s...

It is Mum's birthday today. Yesterday, I prepared the traditional Parsi celebratory dessert of rava, sweetened semolina and milk with rosewater and pistachios... I made some fresh milk bread to go with hot morning chai, and late this evening I cooked some figgy chicken with mashed potatoes and sugar snap peas (Dad loves the comfort of mashed potatoes) and on we shall go into the snowy depths of February. Meanwhile, I thought I'd share some of my readings from last month.

The Body Knows The Score by Bessel Van der Kolk has become one of those therapeutic classics along with Gabor Maté’s When The Body Says No. I found it a compelling read for the most part except where certain therapies were only available under almost laboratory type conditions. The last quarter of the book was therefore interrupted by my next reads, but Van der Kolk is so compassionate, I would absolutely recommend the book to anyone who has suffered trauma in any form.

Azadi by Arundhati Roy is a a very slim volume of essays, including ‘The Pandemic is a Portal’, the brilliant piece Roy wrote upon India being shut down with a four hour grace period. Can you call that grace? No, indeed. And while you’re reading Roy, take a look at Zadie Smith’s Intimations, another beautiful slim volume of essays - both writers are masters of their craft. 

Whenever I can’t put a book down, I am always amazed and gratified that my eyes can withstand the brief marathon. It is always a testament to the author - I felt this way about Deborah Levy‘s The Cost of Living, which is the second memoir in her living autobiography series. The memoir is a response to Simone de Beauvoir’s The Second Sex, and is full of poetic energy, and the feminism of starting over after the failure of a long marriage.

Nikesh Shukla’s Brown Baby was also a memoir I did not want to put down. Writing against the grain of despair in Britain's divisive society, which regularly displays its prejudice, Shukla answers complex questions asked by his young daughters. Innocent enough questions, difficult to answer with ease and hope and the promise of joy. And yet, Shukla finds the vein to draw that hope from.

And lastly, my beloved Eva Ibbotson’s A Company of Swans and A Countess Below Stairs, rounded off my first month for the pandemic new year, with humour and a little dance in my step. 

Friday, 17 January 2020

GROUNDHOG DAY (MONTH, YEAR)

It’s 2020! Which matches neatly for anyone who likes their numbers mirrored or believes in numerical significance. I think I belong to that crowd ... like when I glance at my watch and see the time is 17:17 or 23:23. It happens so often I take it in my stride as one of those natural oddities. So far so good, or so meaningful.

But does anyone really experience a seismic change for the prosperous? And it usually is prosperity (or a pleasant change in the fate of one’s circumstance) that we are hoping the clock will provide on the twelfth beat of the midnight hour. Luck be a lady tonight. Lady, be lucky tonight. Be mine, lucky lady. Be mine, luck. And somehow sandwiched between one year end and one year start, we hold faith on an inbreath and release, eventually, into the real, once again.


What was real for you? For me, it was the influenza virus. How do you know you have the flu, asked the infectious diseases registrar in the emergency department. How did you know you had the flu, asked the immunology consultant on the ward, the next day. I can taste it, I said. It has a certain flavour, an aroma, a texture known to the memory of my cells. (They were listening to me, thinking, ‘Mm-hmm. Sure, kid, gal, woman. Whatever you say.’) Of course, I knew I had the flu because my nephew brought it on a plane from Singapore. I’m going to call you the NOD, I told him. The Nephew of Doom. Dang it Shai, thanks a lot, said the nephew of doom, taking it on his small chin. He made up for it by reading me several pages of Eva Ibbotson’s ‘Journey to the River Sea’. He read most of the book by himself, which pleased his aunt enormously. He knows about Eva. That she had The Lupus. He's not happy she died of it. But he understands she matters to me. I haven't introduced him to Flannery O'Connor yet... I'm not completely merciless.


One month has caterpillared across the seemingly endless bouts of coughing, fever, vomiting (oh, you know about the 'flu? I shall desist from further details)... my immunology consultant wants to see me again on Monday. Yesterday I had a heart monitor fitted to check on its speedy action (we in the biz call it tachycardia) and a few days ago, I had a ghastly paralysing attack of fibromyalgia. 

Dang it, 2020! To quote my precious nephew of delight. See, Raf? That works too. NOD. Nephew of Delight. Also, Nieces of Delight. All four of my delights are just that. 'Don't eat me!' they say. 'Cook me!' they say. 'Are you listening to me?' they demand. 'Copy me!' they command. Alright, 2020, if that's all you have in store for me, along with this writing m'larky, I'll take it.      

Sunday, 30 January 2011

Eva Ibbotson

It may surprise you to learn that my favourite author (in the whole wide world) is Eva Ibbotson.
Is, I say, even though, on October 20, 2010, she died.

The thing is, it came as a complete shock to me to read the word Obituary alongside her name, because she wasn't supposed to die. Ever. Or at least not yet. Thirteen years I've been dredging up the courage to write to her, and failing miserably, because all I wanted to say was "I love you!" "You make me so happy!" And other toe-curling embarrassments.

And then a few days ago, I did what I've been doing for years - I 'searched' for her, online. And... I know. It's not about me. She was a wife, a mother, a grandmother. But I loved her all the same. She always wrote happy endings for her children's books, inspite of, or maybe because of her own childhood landscape of Hitler, and leaving Vienna, her parents' divorce and living with elderly (moustachioed) aunts; her adult romances are the essence of poetry, but practical, in the way only women can be. And when I was 18, and lupus had just confined me to bed, my father scoured the Little Shelford library, and the book he discovered and carefully brought home to me, was A Company of Swans by Eva Ibbotson.

She had lupus too, you know. Only she was 80 when it struck. And it made her snarky in interviews. (My love for her only deepened at this point, as you can imagine.)

So why, oh why, didn't I write to her?

I think... I didn't write... just in case... she didn't write back.

And I realise I have tried to be amusing, because she always was, because this is not an obituary. But I am only pretending. The truth is, I am grieving, for someone who was never really mine. But her words are with me, which is all that matters. Right? At least, that is what I shall tell myself, for the rest of my life. Is there anyone you wish you could have written to? Is there anyone you did write to? And, if so, was it a good idea?

"You read what you've written, and you realise that something is still there. Because, you know, you see yourself tottering around, dropping china, having to go to bed at eight, but somehow something of your self remains, and you have written it." - Eva Ibbotson

I love you Maria Charlotte Michelle Wiesner, otherwise known as Eva Ibbotson! You make me sooooo happy!!!