Friday 22 April 2011

Sweet Bird of Youth

The bird of youth flew by this way
and grimaced at my tears
Why do you cry? he seemed to say
The sun is out, summer is here,
and I have come to play.

Sweet bird of youth
you cannot see my fever burn
Nor feel the ache that breaks me
You trill and flit, you dance and turn,
and yawn your boredom away.

- Shaista, 2011
My mother called me 'a glass vessel' in her native tongue this morning. "You are a kanch nu vaasan," she scolded gently. "And you have to treat yourself as such."
You see, I recently attempted a Normal Day. I went to the Fitzwilliam Museum (Italian etchings!! Raphael, Tintoretto, Guardi, Modigliani, Tiepolo, Parmigianino!), ate delicious salty haloumi cheese with my friends at a Turkish joint, and then went swimming, jacuzzing and sauna-ing. Maybe, I thought, who knows, I thought, I've gotta try, thought I.

Mum just brought in a Magnolia from the garden to keep me company through the fever, sore throat, infection. We gaze at each other, the Magnolia and I, wanting exactly the same thing. To break out of our glass vessels, and return to our rightful place in the sun.

Maybe I'll just nip out into the sun for a minute. The fever will still be here when I get back, and after all, it is Good Friday. A day of suffering and joy to come. And anyway, there's to be a Royal Wedding soon...

So.. Happy Easter? :)


Sherry Blue Sky said...

Oh Shaista, you always inspire! Even though there is pain, I am glad you had that happy day, it was likely worth it. But maybe HALF of that day at a time would be wiser, hee hee. I love what you wrote about the magnolia and you wanting the same thing. Yes, I so wish you could be out there under the sun, and dancing under the moon. But you dance, you shine, for us, here on this screen. I have rarely seen anyone shine brighter!!!!!

And.....a wedding? Your brother and the fair Angelina? Happiness abounds!

Rest well, the pain and fever will ease, my friend.

Shaista said...

Sherry, I meant the Royal Wedding between Kate Middleton and the fair Prince William :) So have swiftly altered my post in case anyone else mistakes my meaning ;)

p.s. I did get some sun, and the butterflies came out in full force to join me. Back to the fevers for now.

steven said...

shaista - that's a powerful characterization. a glass vessel. in some way we're all glass vessels. i rode my bike behind a vehicle with a lupus canada ribbon it and thought of you with care and compassion and gratitude for the fact that you have the strength to be here sharing yourself. steven

Jeanne-ming Brantingham said...

Happy Easter dear transparent one

Andrew said...

If a glass vessel means easily shattered I can relate.

I had you on e mail and I did not get this post.

Be well Shaista.

Ruth said...

Hello, pretty, eager bird. We found six wild mallard eggs. They are like glass too. The nest is protected, with a bit of sun shining in two of the eggs.

Be good, sit in the sun for a bit, and let the art you saw inspire you to write in your stillness. Be careful now. We need you.

* said...

Thank goodness for the loving scold of a mother!

"You are a kanch nu vaasan" -- I can picture her saying it, her voice, her smile.

Hope your fever passes and that more jacuzzing and sauna-ing are on the horizon for you.

And Happy Easter/spring, there are chocolate eggs hidden all over the place here (and I've discovered nearly every one!).


Elizabeth said...

It must be so difficult to leave that glass vessel and fly, but it sounds as if you must, if only now and then. Be well.

Hyde Park Poetry Palace said...

stunning writing,
sad yet well done.

Hyde Park Poetry Palace said...

stunning writing,
sad yet well done.


Great work!

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